Finished! Yes! Even though it took me twice as long as everyone else in the class, and has its share of forgivable imperfections, ze bag ez fini! It's a pretty girly bag, but I made more for the experience rather than "a need for more bag."
Howdy, howdy.
So, currently, I have been getting crafty. Just a smidge, but I am planning on wading further and further into the world of fabrics and paints and stamps and knitting and god knows what else. I've wanted to learn to sew for years and years, and now, thanks to the Home Ec Workshop, that dream is slowly being realized. I am almost done with this bag that I hope turns out just cool enough. Cool enough for a project of this complexity. However, I will post that pic when it is completed.
In the meantime, I did manage to get some patches that I hand painted sewn onto a pair of jeans that my friend, Jon, donated to me. It is really all experimental right now. And I tend to go for sloppy-chic while figuring out how to make what I like actually work.
The text on the patches are part of a poem I wrote years back. The complete poem goes
"Outlive your demons.
Transform them
into a pool of raw resources.
Nourish not only yourself
but all those around you
willing and able to accept and benefit.
When being chased by tigers,
make pancakes.
- The Lesson of Sambo"
Just got through listening to this, and I thought it would be a very good thing to share:
So what is up with the Katman these days, you ask. Well, let me tell you…
Today I worked for a general labor company on flood clean up. Seemly simple, I spent the day sweeping outside. For 10 hours. So even though it wasn’t lugging huge pieces of furniture or- I don’t know, scraping dried mud from the walls with a toothbrush, it was still exhausting by the end. Although I’ve never worked prison detail- which cannot be said of some of my fellow labor employees, I imagined it to feel something akin to this- without the threats of gang rape to look forward to later. (No, I don’t think prison rape is funny.) I took the work because it is temp work that offers plenty of hours and pays $10 an hour- not too bad for Iowa City- so that I can eventually soon be able to move from Iowa City. However, I will be scouring the Want Ads for something a little less grueling. Tonite I am treating myself to dinner at Thai Flavors- which kind of defeats the purpose of working all day to make money- but I’m just not willing to cook after all that. I guess that makes me lucky. Some folks don’t have that option.
So other than this, I have been working on my resume,
looking for jobs in Baltimore, and when I’m at my nice cushy parking job, I’ve
been watching video after video of British detective shows: Waking the Dead,
Midsomer Mysteries, and Marple (as in Ms.), to name a few. Marple, starting
Gerladine McEwan is a favorite.
She is so perfect for Agatha Christie’s crime
solving senior citizen. She's so endearing and savvy at the same time. Actually,
I’ve been scouring our local Iowa City library- which Rocks! for all kinds of
British goodies- including the new Dr. Who series. I’m a big Torchwood Fan- as much as I can
be without owning a TV, and I got to see the episode where Dr. Who meets dreamy
Captain Jack. I googled up one John Barrowman- who plays Captain Jack, the
omni-sexual alien hunter from the 51st century, and found out to my
joy that he is gay. Gay, gay, gay. And it gave me hope to see that “they”
actually are letting a gay man play a lead role where, no less, he often engages in man
to man liplocking, no less. Of course, this is a British show. Let’s see when
such a day comes locally.
Alright, my food is here and I must munch. Hugs and stir fry.
"Kat be nimble, Kat be quick"- I'm doing the mambo with a limbo stick. And by that I mean the feeling of limbo that I've been experiencing after graduation. I'm sure it is fairly common. The deal is I'm still in Iowa City, looking out to the East- but the future is still cloudy. What next? How soon? What to do?
David from Bmore came to visit last Thursday and we had a really great time- having dinner with friends- and of course Gen and Alex dazzled and delighted all with their exquisite cuisine. But while sitting at the dinner table surrounded by my beautiful, loving and supportive Iowa City friends, Baltimore started feeling like a scary uncertainty. Not "bad"- just so new and devoid of all the comforts I've accumulated here in Iowa City. It really made the idea of loss of my current life hard to think about.
Over the course of a few days, I've realized that I do not have to rush off to Baltimore by a certain time in a certain way with absolutes that I must achieve once I get there. After processing lots of feelings and thoughts with friends, I've realized that I can wrap things up here in Iowa City a day at a time. I can just stay open to the moment while things unfold- I don't have to go rushing off to a future life just because I have graduated. I can put the pieces together gradually, rather than searching for an instant outline of "what's next." What's next is this moment, and then this moment, and then the one after that. I will continue to research things in Baltimore but while doing so, I will enjoy taking care of the immediate business of life in Iowa City. I so dearly love my friends here. As much as I am excited by the prospects of a future life of art and activism, I am also enjoying the all the fruits that have blossomed for me over the past three and a half years here in Iowa City. I want to savor and share them for as long as possible.
So Baltimore is still on my horizon, as far as I know. But I am also going to check out some other cities just so I have somethings to compare and contrast. What with this being my life and all, I don't have to sell myself short by getting attached to ideals. There is a lot of room for movement and new possibilities. I want to listen to what they all have to say and then go dancing with the ones that promise the most fun, the most growth and the most progressive, healthy change. I am content to wait and listen until I hear that laughter riding against my front door. Then I can step out with confidence that the flow of new life is with me- and not get tangled in expectations set on ideals. That just sounds like a lot more fun- and much more friendly.
So there it is. I'm still in IA City- and will be for part, if not all of the summer. Keep your love flowing this way and I will return it with a hug.
Kman
Edited from this morning's journal:
Jon invited me over to Gen and Alex’s to watch Obama give his acceptance speech- which was brilliant and honest and real, btw. No matter what happens, nothing can change what happened last night. Nothing. It is reality. It is now part of our history. It signals that things really can change for the better in America. He was just telling it like it was, saying Iraq was a mistake from the beginning. And yet he was gracious. That is his gift, he doesn’t rip people apart- except when it came to defending himself against Hillary, and you could tell it was something he wasn’t comfortable doing. He clearly doesn’t enjoy being combative the way she just loves it- goes for it, digs into whatever she can find and entrenches herself in these contrary positions. God, she really just did herself in. Not giving a concession speech really is the capstone to the mini-legacy of her run for presidency. I just- I really wish her well in terms of seeing what she has done versus what she could have done and maybe finding some of her soul again. It became all about winning and not about the issues or the people. The issues and the people- these were areas where she would form shapes and wield words, but there was nothing actually connected to them at the end- it was about her winning and not wanting to lose. It really was about ego. And that is sad. That is unfortunate. I mean, there comes a time when you just give up your picture for the bigger picture- you mourn, you grieve, you let go and you move on. But it really does take someone who is addicted to power to not acquiesce. It makes me think of George Bush, actually. That sort of behavior that says, “I’m right, I’m right, I’m right and damn all the facts.” I pictured opening up the paper today (which I don’t actually ever do) and finding that she had crowned herself Empress of America. Because that is what she wanted and that this what she will do- she won’t settle for anything less. And it is that sort of single-minded, power hungry malevolence that we are trying so desperately to flush out of the White House. So I don’t wish her any ill-will, I actually just wish her perspective. And humility. I think that is what we need in the White House most of all. No more of this, “I am the Decider” totalitarian mindset. I fear her doing a Karl Rove- which she has really gotten proficient at- and finding a way to claw a place into the presidency. And the other fear is that Obama will get assassinated before he has a chance to finish the race. There is a lot of talk about how he probably will not offer Hillary the position of vice president after having refused his “olive branch.” I just hope- I really hope that he gets in the White House intact, in one piece. I guess hope is what his campaign is all about. Can things actually change? If they only could. We are all wanting, praying, working so desperately for change. I am just going to my heart open to the possibility. And just keep watching. Ooh. What if he picks John Edwards as his running mate. That would be sooo sweet.
It’s been a couple weeks too long since I’ve updated my blog, but I think the “graduation card” trumps in the case of needing a good excuse.
So over this past winter and spring, I’ve been corresponding with a very nice man named David (aka Druben on the interweb), and we’ve been having some great chats about the arts, education and nonprofit organizations- amongst other things. David lives in Baltimore Maryland and over the time that we’ve been chatting I’ve been checking out Baltimore as a possible next move. And I think I may take the plunge. I will first, of course, find a job in or near the field of my study- but my energies and my intuition seem to be saying “yes!” to this new opportunity.
So why Baltimore?
*I’d like to get to know my new friend, David, better.
*Baltimore
is near the ocean- which I’ve always missed ever since moving from California
back in the early
90s.
*It is
city with a black majority- and I’d really like to get out of the white
mid-west and see what it is like
when my white privilege is clearly in front of
my face.
*The winters are generally around the 40s. After this year’s seemingly endless winter- who can blame me for wanting to try a new climate?
*
Baltimore is plagued with problems with crime and poverty, Moving to a “safe
haven” (or staying in one,
like Iowa City) would be missing why I’ve gone to
school to begin with- which was to become someone
who creates community, and
thereby, heals the world- even if it is just one neighborhood at a time.
*I’ve never lived on the East Cost before- and it is time to try something new.
*It just feels right.
I know I spoke about moving to Vancouver at one point- and that is still a goal. But I think Baltimore may make a great training ground in honing my skills and putting what I’ve learned into practice. My crystal ball can’t see too far into the future- I’d like to see moving to Vancouver happen…someday.
And how does it feel having graduated? Wonderful. I’m happy. Life is good. And I’ve been blessed. Now I want to sow those blessings where I can and watch the healing unfold- sewing up whatever pockets will sing with the strings of change.
Ever heard of Second Life? If not, here is a fun research paper (yes, checking out Second Life was an assignment turn addiction) - and some pics, from my new time sink.
The online simulation community that I checked out is called Second Life- or I as I have come to call it- “Second Crack,” as I have a very hard time not logging in and playing around for hours.
Learning how to “live” in second life took up a good portion of my time there. When one first arrives to the world of Second Life (or SL) there is an orientation phase that- if one is patient enough, all sorts of essential beginner skills can pick up. It took me a while to realize I should go through most of these and get comfortable with the software before flying off- literally- to work on the project.
As I was getting accustomed to my new found life, asking the kinder residents on how to leap straight up and other seemingly simple, yet useful, activities- I marveled at how many shopping malls there were. Shopping malls and discotechques- these seem to be the staple of SL. As I was asking one gentleman about some functionality- I said that I could not believe how many malls there were- and wasn’t it odd that people would come to a second life to shop? After politely answering my small barrage of questions, he unabashedly let me know that he was off to do just that. All too soon the mysterious allure of shopping in Second Life became clear.
I quickly realized my avatar needed new skin. And better hair. And a cooler outfit. How was I going to get these things? By going to the malls, the stores and the freebie shops. How could I scout around looking for data about SL business ventures with low-def hair and the generic clothes that came with my avatar’s inventory? Embarrassing! One is only afforded $300 Lindens (the term for SL money, named after the SL creator) and I found I am just as stingy with imaginary money as I am with real. Eventually, however, I did find some true bargains and managed to run into three store owners, as well whom I approached to begin my research. One disappeared before I reached her, another excused himself shortly after I said “hello” and the third had her status set to “busy” and was, therefore, not available to provide assistance. Actually, even more frustrating than trying to shop in the real world, there is almost never a proprietor or sales clerk around when you are shopping. It tends to be a rather solitary experience. Hours later, as my bargain hunting continued, and my shape shifting skills improved (thank Linden for those freebie stores!), I finally acquired a look that I felt I could wear with some amount of casual pride and self respect.
Finally, I started checking out art galleries instead of shopping malls. Here is where I found proprietors that were willing to talk to me. A delightful and sparkly Mona Mendes told me that she photographs her original painting and then uploads them into her SL art gallery. People buy these works of art to put on the walls of their avatar’s houses (Yes, you can have your own house with which you may furnish as you please). Although she said she doesn’t have a large enough body of work to have a show in RL (real life), she agreed that this was a great way to advertise. She also said selling her artwork in SL affords her to buy things in using $L (Lindens) and not having to use her RL money. She generously invited me to join her art group in SL where I could go to art events and meet new people- which I graciously accepted.
After taking a tour to more galleries (Mona introduced me to a hub that would guide me), I eventually met Meb Collins. Meb runs an art gallery cooperative. From him I learned that the money people make in $L could actually be traded in for RL money. He said that 240 Lindens were equal to a RL dollar. So feasibly, depending on how successfully one marked one’s self, it would be possible to be making some nice cash while idling the hours away in Second Life. Either way it is a great way to advertise and build a following, as well as a community of fellow artists.
In terms of how one could improve upon Second Life, I am left with more thoughts on personal preferences, as opposed to general use. I had wondered that if all people do in Second Life was shop and dance. But, according to Mona, there are actual art openings which people- via their avatars, attend. I had thought I would find people role playing and riding dragons- but that is a niche market. However, that market does exist in SL, as do the groups who role play in SL.
Even though I have spent hours here (sadly, undocumented as I can only verify the date of my “birth,” and not the hours I have racked up), I feel that I have only scratched the uppermost surface of what Second Life has to offer. I am hoping it stays that way, however, otherwise I fear that my first life may start to suffer from neglect and absenteeism.
My Avatar (it's like playing dress up with a 3-D doll):
Other Citizens of SL:
A Genuine Simulated Cat Man:
With the naughty bits edited out, of course...
Do you know the Keeper of Thy Gems? She and her posse of glimmering gals rocked the hizzy at Picador. Despite the technical difficulties with Leslie's mic, the show was a blast. The only point where the show started to lag is when Leslie invited some ladies onto the stage and named their sweaters- and almost knocking out the teeth of one of the gals in the process (yikes!). And of course, that part would have been so much better had I been invited onto stage in my hand made bedazzled shirt (see final picture), but oh well.